Thursday, June 25, 2009

The New Frugality In Action: Columbus Firefighter Sweeps Horse's Ass Awards

We're reliably informed that David Santuomo, a firefighter with the Columbus, Ohio fire department, decided that he and his sig other would take a vacation.

In order to practice the new frugality we've been hearing so much about lately, Santuomo cobbled up a silencer for his rifle and then proceeded to assassinate his two dogs in the basement of his house rather than pay to have them boarded or supervised by neighbors.

He dumped the bodies in a dumpster behind his duty station and bragged to friends about it. The entire affair came to light via an anonymous tip. How much you wanna bet it was one of his mates at the fire station?

It is said he fired 11 shots, which tells you he doesn't know doodley squat about killing dogs or anything else for that matter. A single shot at the base of the skull is sufficient.

Well, nevermind. He pled guilty to animal cruelty and manufacturing a criminal device (a home brew silencer) and was sentenced to ninety days, to be served in ten day increments-which means he'll have to explain it all to a new group of cellies at least nine times.

The jury's still out over whether he gets to keep his job. Anyone that stupid doesn't need a cushy city job.

Talk about giving self respecting criminals a bad name-there oughtta be an entrance examination.


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